Me: When’s your next business trip?

Graham: I don’t know.

Me: In the next two months maybe?

Graham: Probably not. Why do you ask?

Me: I have a horror book I want to read and a movie to watch. I want to make sure you’re going to be around while it’s still fresh in my head.

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Most people probably outgrow their childhood fears, but I still have severe existential hang-ups and paranoia of the paranormal. In all fairness, I really do it to myself. I grew up watching horror films with my grandmother in her bedroom. Since my grandmother spoke almost no English, horror films provided an unlikely way for us to bond. Visual suspense and fear bridged successfully across the linguistic divide. I’ve grown desensitized to some subgenres (slashers, monsters, zombies, etc.), but then there are the ones that burrow into childhood fears and metastasize into my imagination.

I’ve always lived in close proximity to other people. Family, apartments, roommates/housemates, and now, husband, so even if my paranoia choked back sleep, I at least felt some comfort knowing that there was only a thin wall or door that separated me from other people, and sleeping with your significant other in the same bed eliminates the dilemma of whether to sleep facing the door or the closet. In the end it doesn’t matter since your S/O’s logic brainwaves will drive away the boogeyman.

However… panic always sets in when Graham has a business trip.

Once upon a time though, when we first started dating, I asked Graham that if we were ever living together.. and I suddenly got bad vibes about a place, if he’d promise to let us move. I’ve seen The Omen, Rosemary’s Baby, Insidious.. and in all of those movies, Lee Remick, Mia Farrow, and Rose Byrne are never taken seriously and then all hell breaks loose as their fears are proven. Graham promised we’d move.

Last night, on a whim, I asked him if he remembered that promise.

No.

Shoot. Now I have to add “Pod People” to my list.

Stacy