First, I’m going to say how disappointed I am that I couldn’t do a cut-out letters ransom note since we don’t have magazines at home.. or glue that isn’t dried out.. and you know who this is anyways so that already defeats the purpose.. in short, I’m disappointed. Anyhow..
*We have your Lillet.
It is currently unharmed.. really… proof of life as of today, September 7. 2016.
But whether it continues existing in its current state depends on your ability to meet *our my demands.
Your Lillet will be returned to you unharmed if you successfully exchange it for a dozen of your homemade macarons.. any flavors will suffice with the exception of those listed here.
Failure to comply will force a fate on your bottle similar to its friend:
That one is nearly empty… only a fraction of the bottle that it used to be.
Tell your parents, and the Lillet will suffer the consequences. You can start saying goodbye to it piece by piece at a time.. again.. like its buddy..
You have 72 hours. Clock starts now.
Stacy
*Your brother did not approve this message.
