… is communication.
Sorry, make that, “The key to marriage is GOOD communication.”
The best part of being in Seattle wasn’t seeing old friends (if you’re reading this guys, sorry.. although you were in the Top 5), showing Graham around, having drinks again at Unicorn, or a bunch of other things I was excited about during the trip. No, it was this:The fact that my old QFC Advantage number still works!
I didn’t think that feeling could be topped so soon, but then this happened:Yes.. those are the trypophobic-inducing asiatic lilies.. and yes, that’s a compost bin. Thank you, Graham for helping me pry those suckers out of the ground and for being so much less of a jerk than me that you didn’t chase me around the yard with them.
Like a lot of people, I have insecurities about my physical appearance.. like my underbite.. and my lack of a butt.. and my weight. I can’t really do much about the first two on that list, but at least I could follow my cyclic ritual of getting into shape..
Spring = Jogging -> Summer = Jogging-> Autumn = Jogging (maybe) -> Winter = Binge myself into hibernation
This summer, however, I’ve been incredibly frustrated. Thanks to my herniated disc, I haven’t been able to go running since April. Although my back has been getting better, working out has been confined to physical therapy exercises that are absent of any kind of cardio high. Without being able to go jogging, or walking everywhere, or even tackling housework other than sweeping and washing dishes, I was convinced I had been gaining weight.
So I was pretty surprised to notice that my shorts seemed looser, and I was having to tug them up a lot. I didn’t think too much of it until I started having to pull up my underwear too.
YES! In spite of missing out on the cardio and upping my burger intake (thanks, grilling season) I’m losing weight! A follow-up visit to my doctor confirmed that I’d lost a few pounds.
I went through my closet and found a dress I wore 2 summers ago, wondering if it just might fit this season.
YAY!!! That’s also a new haircut =)
No, that’s not me pregnant. It’s me – hello, summer, I didn’t lose any weight and that scale at the doctor’s office was lying.
That’s when I realized though…
And…I’d lost weight all right. All of it from my butt!.. that thing I’ve had to sit on for most of the summer while participating in marathons… of Investigation Discovery. I had lost weight in the one place I really needed to gain it! =(
That would be me on the right.. without the butt. Not that I ever really had one.. but at least I had just enough of one to keep my underwear up. I think Graham just bought some duct tape on a Home Depot run.. I also found this website:
And if you click on the link and checkout the domain name, I’ll tell you this.. No, the irony did not escape me. And I’ve just created usage 35.
Rekindling a romance with an ex is hardly ever a good idea; although sentimental feelings may initially get the better of you, sooner or later, two things may happen. One is that you realize that you’ve both changed too much for it to work.
In spite of the parks, food (Graham finally got to try a Seattle dog straight from the cart… 3 times), and scenery, the city’s gone through some major changes since I left. Modern boxy a”pod”ments have cropped up all over the city. There’s a Panera Bread on Capitol Hill.. A Panera Bread! I have nothing against Panera Bread, but to see it sprout up on the first floor space of condo building made me sad. So many of my favorite places have closed their doors.. and Capitol Hill seems to be resonating a different vibe. The average price of a one-bedroom is now over $1600/mo. I remember when mine cost $900/mo. I know.. my complaint is betraying my age. I don’t know how many times Graham heard me wail, “What the heck is this?!” every time we happened across a new micro-condo building or flashy-looking bar. “The Seattle I knew has jumped the shark!”
Okay, that whiney comment isn’t fair. It seems like the changes happening to the old neighborhoods are to accommodate the younger transplants attracted to the abundance of both established tech companies and start-ups. My surliness stems from my intense dislike of box-y buildings (it’s so silly how “easy to use, out of the box” housing literally puts you in a 225 sq ft box) and the younger generation.. so in other words, the stereotypical attitude that “everything was better before” that comes with age.
The second thing that inevitably happens is that your differences start to resurface.
If you ask my friends and family to describe me, “laid-back,” will make an appearance on the list.. as “whatever the hell the antithesis of laid-back is.” True. Before I moved to Philly, I’d never lived on the East Coast. Yet, for some reason, people have always been surprised that I grew up in the Midwest and lived in Seattle, usually pinning me, instead, as a stereotypical angry East Coaster. Graham got to witness my impatience rearing its ugly head during our vacation: “WTF! These people need to just get the hell off the sidewalk if they’re not going to actually move!”
Yes, I am, by nature, an angry person. Sorry. <— Apparently, really apologetic about it.
There was one particular incident that soured a large portion of our Monday afternoon. We stopped off at Top Pot Doughnuts after finishing up the Underground Tour (highly recommend it.. even for long-time Seattle residents if you’ve never done it) and got coffees and shared a doughnut. We needed to get back to Capitol Hill to make it to drinks with some friends, so Graham took his coffee with him to finish up on the way.
Within a few blocks though, the peacefulness of the day was interrupted by a rogue dufflebag that a passerby walking in the opposite direction without a sense of diplomatic personal space wildly swung into Graham’s coffee.. covering both our cardigans, my jeans, t-shirt, and bra in lukewarm latte. The man muttered an “ooops,” as he continued walking.. no apologies.. no stopping. Graham and I both yelled profanities after him.. but y’know.. not too loud.. we felt conspicuous disrupting the laid-back West Coast vibe of those around us who stared in bewilderment at bridled East Coast fury.While we searched for a Tide pen on our way back to our AirBnB (a brand new pen I’d eventually need to use all of on just 2 articles of clothing), I kept thinking, about how much I wanted to unleash the wrath of a Philadelphian on that guy. That’s when I realized, in spite of all my Seattle-raving.. Philadelphia really is where I belong.
So… here’s my revised break-up letter to Seattle..
When processed through the Stacy-Handwriting-Decoder:
I will always have the greatest admiration and respect for you. You were exactly what I needed at that moment in my life, and I will always cherish the memories and be grateful for your part in my growth. That being said, I acknowledge we’re on different paths from each other. I wish you all the best and will always reserve a special place in my heart for you. I know we’ll always be good friends.
If you’ve ever caught up with an ex you’ve spent time thinking about wistfully, your initial impression is usually positive and you start wondering “Why did we ever break up?” Seattle summers have the same effect on me. Talk to any Seattleite about the things they love most about their city, and “The Summers” will probably be found amongst the top 5. It’s definitely the best time to visit if you’re at a loss for deciding when to plan a trip, although there is one great disadvantage to the season: too much to see and do that you might not get to fit everything on your list. I didn’t have a chance to show off Discovery Park, Dim-Sum, Pho, any of the islands, Gas Works Park, etc.. but luckily, I managed to fit enough into our 5 days that Graham was pleased with the city. There are a couple areas I thought I’d highlight on the blog that you don’t hear about as often as the Space Needle, Pike Place Market, or Gum Wall when Seattle comes up as a travel topic.Volunteer Park – Designed by the Olmsted brothers, and if you’re a fan of Devil In The White City by Erik Larson, you probably recognize what was once the foremost name in landscape architects.
The park includes a conservatory, a water tower (with free access to an observation deck), a gated reservoir, and the Seattle Asian Art Museum.
My favorite feature of the park though would have to be the dahlia garden.As I mentioned on Instagram earlier this week, I chose dahlias for my bridal bouquet specifically because it reminded me of Volunteer Park.
Lakeview Cemetery – Next door to Volunteer Park is Lake View Cemetery.. aka the final resting place for both Bruce and Brandon Lee. Even if you’re not a Kung Fu film buff or a former goth kid obsessed with The Crow, it’s still worth a visit if only for gravestone photography or the gorgeous monkey puzzle tree.
There’s usually a few people in the cemetery paying their respects to the Lees, evident by the numerous bouquets that are left on their graves, but it’s ideal if you’re looking for a quiet place with some aesthetics to recharge before continuing on with sites with more tourist traffic.
Yes, that’s an illustration of the fear Graham developed while we were in Seattle. And no, it isn’t the color “coral”.. I’ve already cultivated that fear in him thanks to my insistence of bringing “pops of color” to the 3rd floor landing by way of throw pillows and prints.
When I asked Graham what he’d be most interested in seeing during our trip, he said he wanted “A Tour Of Stacy’s Seattle.” He wanted to experience the city the way I did when I lived there from 2006-2011. What he didn’t realize was “A Tour Of Stacy’s Seattle” translates into a lot of walking (my preferred method of travel being my own two feet), eating, and drinking (Graham made the comment that he felt like he was back in college during our visit).
By our first morning, he figured out the full implications of his request and wanted to take it back. We had brunch at my favorite spot Toulouse Petit in lower Queen Anne, and after sufficiently weighing ourselves down with the rich Bayou Fisherman’s Breakfast and Dungeness Crab Eggs Benedict, I told Graham I wanted to show him the view of Seattle’s skyline from Kerry Park which was a short walk away.
This image could stand to be slightly more accurate..
However, forgiveness did not mean he wasn’t going to do everything possible to avoid the hills in the city. But one of the things I love about Graham is that he’s a trooper. We’d walk 5-8 miles a day without a complaint from him.. well.. unless it was uphill.
Although I lived in Seattle for almost 5 years, I never visited the Space Needle. Showing Graham around the city provided the perfect excuse to remedy that. From the top of the tower, I pointed out how far we’d walked that morning and afternoon.And as a thank you, I agreed we could take an Uber back.. at least partway.. to one of my favorite bars…And then walked the 1.6 miles back to the Airbnb.
PS. In case you’d like to see other views from the Space Needle including Lake Union and Elliot Bay and the unscribbled original of the photo above..
A change in the blog schedule this week as I’m planning on updating more than twice with a Seattle series.
After graduating from high school, I promised myself that I wouldn’t live in any one city for longer than 5 years. The perpetual Five-Year-Plan of logistics was no doubt a side effect of growing up in small town Salina, KS. Moving to a completely new city may seem daunting to most people, but around the 4th year of taking up residence somewhere, my feet would start to itch with the need to wander, and my heart would ache for new adventures. I’ve always been able to happily bid goodbye to a city (save for the friends I’d made) from the rearview mirror of a car, but Seattle was the outlier. The morning of my departure in 2011, my friend Jon picked me up to take me to the airport, and as I kept looking back to watch Seattle’s skyline shrink into the horizon, I was surprised to find myself struggling against tears.
When I decided to move back to the Midwest, I joked about my breakup letter to my home of 4.5 years:
Since leaving Seattle five years ago, I’ve lived in Ann Arbor, MI and Philadelphia, PA. There were 2 instances when I almost moved back to the PNW (that’s the Pacific Northwest for those of you unfamiliar with the acronym). Although now I’m successfully rooted in Philadelphia, I still rave with some annoying consistency to anyone who will listen about my friends in Seattle and the city itself.
Graham: Want to go out for Pho?
Me: Please. Seattle has the best pho places. And nothing beats Pho Bac. I hate going out for pho here; *sigh* it’s like setting myself up for disappointment.
Graham: You probably shouldn’t be walking through that neighborhood that late at night.
Me: *sigh* You could walk EVERYWHERE in Seattle and not have to worry!
Me: I never had AC in Seattle. You don’t need it except for 3 days in the summer when you just park yourself in a movie theater. Oh, and the sun doesn’t set until like 10:00 at night . *Sigh*
You get the point. I’m one of THOSE people.. Annoying progressive PNW elitist.
So when Graham and I were trying to decide where to go this summer, I readily accepted his challenge of “Why don’t you show me what’s so great about Seattle.”
Don’t get me wrong.. I love Philly.. but.. Seattle is like that ex you broke up with because you were aiming for something better and more stable, but after several months go by, you start questioning whether you made the right decision.. and then start wondering if you’re viewing the past relationship with the rose-colored glasses that time and distance provide. This trip was going to be my chance to find out by reconnecting with my old flame, the Emerald City, and staying in my old neighborhood in Capitol Hill.. and I didn’t even have to throw out a passive-aggressive Craiglist missed connection to have that chance.
Late on the posting front today since we just got home to Philly last night after spending a week in my old ‘hood in Seattle. I’ll be back next week with a proper post.. but for now… I just want people to know…
..this is what joy looks like in your 30s…
It’s the little things in life that can really make you happy.
Update to the comics page today.
WARNING: This post contains photos that may trigger those with trypophobia.
When I was a kid, I loved Reading Rainbow. Even now, whenever Graham and I work together to solve a problem, I burst into the chorus of “Teamwork.” For some reason though, when I watched the episode when LeVar Burton visits the New England Aquarium and reads “Louis the Fish,” I was horrified during the “Sea Living” song interlude because of THIS fish:
I couldn’t figure out just why this fish evoked a queasy response from me. I thought maybe it had something to do with the similarities the fish’s pattern had to a hideous dress my grandmother owned.
Fast forward to 2014, and a podcast from Stuff To Blow Your Mind solved the mystery for me.. I’m trypophobic.. for those of you unfamiliar with the term:When Graham and I bought our house this past winter, the last thing I suspected was that it would grow goosebump inducing… things. I don’t mean the centipedes, worms, slugs, or snails that have I’ve unearthed while weeding in the garden, stifling my startled screams so the neighbors don’t snicker about the former Center City girl who’s afraid of nature. No, I’m talking about things like the fern leaves with the patterned undersides that make me squeamish.
When I first discovered we had asiatic lilies growing the backyard, I took great care cultivating them and guarding them every time Graham went outside with the weed whacker. “Mind the lilies!” I’d yell, pointing them out. I’d never grown lilies before, and was determined that we’d see these bloom. One day, I suddenly noticed something about the lilies that had grown past my waist..WTF? No, I mean… WTF?! No, no, no, no. I panicked under my trypophobia for a moment, then sought a quick Google education which taught me that these were actually asiatic lily seeds.. and scattering them around would give me new lilies for next season. I braved the goosebumps the mere appearance of these things had given me and began plucking them off the stem and tossing them all over the yard while an amused Graham watched. I was going to see these babies through to bloom!ARGH! Just typing about these things is giving me gooseflesh again.
And earlier this week.. it finally happened.
From the kitchen window, while pouring my morning coffee, I could see the back of one of the lilies.. the petals had unfurled. I could make out the orange tips curled back. Excitedly, I headed out with the dog, ready to enjoy the payout of weeks of nurturing and overcoming my trypophobia.
THE BLACK SPOTS!! I had to look away. If the triggered trypophobia hadn’t left me feeling so disgusted, I would have found the humor in nature’s irony. That’s when the gravity of the situation hit HARD.
I HAD THROWN THE SEEDS ALL OVER THE YARD!
Graham has specific instructions for next year.
Take No Prisoners. Weed whack EVERYTHING.
That’s how it goes. I create the problems, and Graham provides the solutions.